Included, yet Excluded

Yeah, this may not be the last you hear about this subject mostly because it burns me to think of how lame it is. How is it that you can receive an invitation to something you don't really feel welcome to, yet you make the decision to brave it. Once you brave the uncomfortable, you find yourself even more uncomfortable when you are obvious and evidently excluded. Lame. I wanted to pick up my keys at that moment and split! I didn't take off and I even spoke up to say that it was lame. So, at the end of the night, I felt better for being honest but the same as far as being included. It was just an uncomfortable evening to which I was invited as an afterthought. Oh well, live and learn. Right?

Inspired. Again.

So, months have gone by and suddenly I feel inspired to start to write a bit again. I wonder what the theme of this spurt might be. It seems the last one was me just trying to process all the pain I was feeling. Not that the pain is gone now, but at least I feel like I am on the road to healing in a way I wasn't several months ago.

Monday morning. I have more energy today simply because I stayed home yesterday. Seems more and more I recognize that I am an introvert. I get energy just from being alone. Yesterday, things just fell into place for me to do just about nothing. Sure, I drank my coffee in the morning; relaxed in the afternoon and even exercised. Then Amazing Race at 7pm followed by looking at pictures and crying because I miss Peru in the evening. I realize that I was truly happy there doing what I was doing, living where I was living and being with who I was with. My smiles were bigger and more genuine.

Today, I work and will stay to work out since I am on the journey to get healthy. I feel much better than I did a month ago, I have lost 10 pounds and inches off just about everywhere on my bod. But, I still have a ways to go!

Anyway, just felt like I needed to say (to no one) that I am back.